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drgregorygordon


                                 


Mar. 13, 2022

THE BASKET CASE

I had seen patients all day and it was dreary , cold, and rainy. My family met in the office parking lot and we started on our nine hour jaunt. I tried to enlist help in the driver's seat but to no avail and so on we went. They all slept most of the way except for occasional bickering . I was exhausted. I was wiped out after about 8 hours as the windshield wipers chanted to me all the way in unison,' You are tired, You are tired! '

It was many years ago ,and yet I do remember it was a Thursday . Our oldest son Joshua needed to go up to Dubuque University to look into the possibility of playing basketball for them. He wanted to study aviation ,and we were told they had a great flight program.

We were an hour or so shy of our destination and for me it was game over. I secured a room and my brain was Jell-O. I had asked another earlier about my route up to Dubuque. I wanted to confirm as well as ask another question .

I thanked him for his help and started to turn away. I forgot the main reason that had walked down to the main office.

I staggered down to the front office. I look haggard and worn. I could barely keep my eyes open. At the front desk was a slim young man that looked like he could be on the cover of GQ magazine. After saying hello I asked him to confirm my plans and route the next morning. All I had to do was drive around the Cracker Barrell restaurant and head 60 miles straight north on highway 60. No way! Even I couldn't screw that up!

I told him I had another question and he crouched and held up as if hold a catcher's mitt . He told me he was ready. I asked him if he could see the clock on the wall. Now I would like to think of myself as a wordsmith .This was not my best moment. To this day, I wish I had a copy of this conversation on video. I told him it said it was 7 minutes till tomorrow and he smiled and told me once again I was spot on. I asked what time is it up there in Dubuque right now. He told me it was the same time up there as well as all of Iowa. He smiled as he answered what was I am sure in his mind a silly question. I thanked him again and went out the door and off to see if I could find our room all by myself. I apologize to all the other residents of my beloved home state of Indiana. I left him I feel with the impression that all Hoosiers are like Forrest Gump.

I had shared this story many times in the office with patients. I think by doing so it reminds me to be a little more open to the fact that sometimes a silly question is not at all but they know in reality much more about the subject than we do and are even aware.

I wish I had the time and energy to explain that I am from a place where about about 15 miles away is a different time zone, even though it is the same state. He would be surprised to hear and learn of this. He might even at first question this knowing that this could indeed cause a state of confusion. Maybe he would google and find my question was not so silly once he knew where I was coming from.

I feel I am a much better doctor than I was years ago. I have had cataracts and cataract surgery in both eyes. Before I was taught about them from books , lectures, and articles. They are no match as to trying to look through them and laying on an operating table looking up and into the various colored lights as they cut on your precious eyes. I can now easily answer from my own journey and what at one time would have threw me for a loop, now makes perfect sense.

It will shield you from a state of confusion or maybe now a country of confusion. It will keep you from being a basket case and you will be able to dispense more grace not because of what you know but because of who you know.

Life has many lessons ahead for all of us that we cannot learn any other way. We all have a long way to go and it is much later than you think. I want you to read you Bible and let God share with your stories and lessons that will help you on your journey as is its purpose.

My God , in you and you alone we trust. Please love and help others through us. Amen

Everything's got a moral, if only you can find it.

Lewis Carroll

Trust one who has gone through it.

Virgil

He who knows best knows how little he knows.

Thomas Jefferson

Judge people by their questions rather than by their answers.

Voltaire

There are places you are better off not visiting. There are people you should not be alone with. There are circumstances you need to avoid. In your heart , you will know what they are. If you are wise, you will pay attention.!

Bob Barnes



               

                        As you come up our drive and after you cross the small creek,you pass between two field stone 

                         pillars that match the stones on our home. There is a light atop both of them . Right now, one is green and the                           the side is white. The green light is to show support for all the people who serve our military as well

                         as those who have done so in the past.

                         

                         At Christmas i hang white lights along the 4 rail horse fence. We change the white one to red and

                         The entryway is good to go. The placement of the red and green has a reason behind it as well. 

                          It may seem to be be random but Iassure you is not the case.


                         On a plane the red light is always on the left side and the green is on the right side. green and right both

                          have 5 letters and this was how I was taught to remember as a boy.  This applies to boats as well.


                         Our oldest son, Josh, is a navel aviator. He and his wonderful wife , Christina, are a week or two from going

                          to Japan. They have lived in several places over the last few years. They lived in Fallon Nevada

                          most recently and we were blessed to have all of our boys and their girls under our roof and together 

                          the holidays. 


                         Since they aproached our farm from the west the right light was green and the left one was on the left 

                         came home. When they were out east in Va it was the reversed. Japan is on the other side of the world

                         so I am not sure what I will do. I have not stepped it off but am told it is about as far east to west as it is 

                         west to east.


                         God is a concerned loving Father who loves you so much! He has made a way for you to come 

                         home through his son Jesus. The porch light of heaven is on . You have a green light my friend.

                         Because of the red blood of Jesus ,your sins are forgiven . Your approach is cleared as well as all your sins.



                         

                          As far as the east is from the west,so far has removed our transgressions from us.

                                                                                                                                                             Psalm 103:12







 ENTRY


                            Yesterday I went out to check on the horses. It has again been very hot here of late and a daily chore

                             to top off the water troughs will cool clear water. As I make my rounds the horses usually get excited when                               they hear the sound of our old red ATV.  Because this vehicle usually has horse feed as well as carrots.                                      We call it "Chuck" short for chuck wagon.


                             There is a mare and two young ones in the south pasture. I whistled and they did not come. I banged on the

                              red tubes on the gate with the scooper. It makes a sound that sounds like a hillbilly dinner bell. I had seen                               them the evening before and knew they were ok. I surmised they had found a place with a breeze and                                       had it   made in the shade.


                            I set the bright orange bucket filled with feed and carrots in front of the gate. This bucket was a physical                                   reminder for me to "let's do this later". I had some mowing to do and that filled several hours of the                                            afternoon. I kept   looking down at the water tank seeing they had not yet drunk from it and for the first                                     time became a little concerned.


                           I went down to the gate and did the two-toned whistle my dad taught me. I do this in honor of him and                                     have taught my sons to do the same. They all would turn and prick up their ears and know it was me if I did                              this   even in a crowd.


                           I banged again on the gate and in no time flat heard the three of them flat out running as hard as they                                       could go. They seemed happy to see me and even more to see Chuck. They were breathing heavy as they                                  devoured   their snacks.


                          My friend I believe God is calling all of us. As we read Scripture, we learn he calls us all differently.  Many                                  people tell me after I speak that I missed my calling. I would quite my practice and enroll in seminary school                            tomorrow if I felt in my heart that is what God wanted for me. I answered my "call to the see" many years                                  ago.  I love the interaction I have with patients for the most part. I never would have believed God would                                  and could use me to write these stories for his glory.


                          He has blended and used the very things I love and hold dear such as horses, hunting, and rivers. I am often                            very surprised at how stories and lessons come together in such a way that I know it is not me but him                                       working through me. Here is the exciting part, he wants to do the same with you. You may not be called to                               write or do eyes, but you are being called. What do you do that gives you joy and satisfaction? There is your                             best clue in regard to what God is calling you to do.


                          I pray that at times this website feeds you. I write for all God's people and not just those who gather under                               the steeple. All I know is when I do this with the hope of pleasing my Savior, it just feels so "write"!


                                                 Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things 

                                                 you do not know.                                                                                       Jeremiah 33:3


                                                   When you empty yourself, God rushes in.  

                                                                                                                                  A.W. Tozer

                                                  

                                                    For the man who prays in his heart, the whole world is a church.

                                                                                                                                   Sylvain of Athos


 ENTRY

                               When I am not working, my style of dress is pretty boring and quite predictable. Even since

                               my college day, jeans ,flannel shirt with rolled up sleeves and boots. 


                               I picked up one of my best friends yesterday morning and he drove about 40 miles

                               to the closest Cracker Barrell for breakfast. We have did this many time over the years

                               and it was great to hang out with him and I already look forward to our next jaunt.


                               We met up on a Saturday morning and I was running a little behind. I came out of the gate slowly

                               and rushed around trying to get dressed and out the door. I opened my hunting sock drawer

                               to get a pair of socks to wear under my boots. I grabbed the first two I saw . They were completly

                              different in both color and thickness. I knew that if I looked I would find another pair that was just

                              like the two I put on.


                              I am a little surprised at my lttle quirk in regard to this. I am very picky about some things

                             and for the most part a fan of balance and symetry.  It doesnt matter to me and in a weird way , I prefer                                     having socks that do not match. I have done this so long it doesn't feel right to me when they are alike.


                           Years ago, we went up to Louisville for a huge boat expo. They had fishing boats, ski boats, and cabin

                           cruisers so large they would qualify as small yachts. One even had a place for aa chopper to land on the rear                               of the giant boat!I am not sure how many vessels we boarded that afternoon. To do so , you had to put a                                       slipper over your shoes or just take off your shows before  touring the boat.


                          The little slip ons were too little for my big boots. I unlaced my boots and just carried them from boat  

                          to boat . it was very crowded and as we walked everyone stared at my two mismatched hunting socks.

                          I could not care less but my wife's face was a shade of red that makes one think of October leaves.

                          I think I enjoyed looking at her more than the big boats.

                           

                          The salesman that were aboard these high  dollar vessels also looked down at my feet with both amusement                              and perhaps disgust. The did not turn red as  the leaves but they decided to leave me alone. I                                                             guess they decided I could not afford a high end vessel if I  could not  afford matching socks. This

                           worked out quite well for me . I saw a few smirks and sneers out of the corner of my eye . This odd look                                        blessed my socks off , and I walked through them  among them without being bothered. 


                          This is a lesson and a reminder for all of us. Maybe sometimes we are too quick to judge and look

                          down  on those who do not live up to and match our own expectations.


                           It is New Years Eve. I do not mean to brag but I have enough money to last me the rest of this year.

                            We are about to cross over the threshold  and through a new door. It is my prayer that God will bless

                           your socks off in 2024!


                             If we could sell our experiences for what they cost us, we'd all be be millionaires.

                                                                                                                                            Abigail Van Buren


                            Only God is in a position to look down on anyone.                 Sarah Brown


                            You can easily judge the character of a man by how he treats those who can do nothing for him.

                                                                                                                                                                            James D. Miles





 ENTRY

                            A few years ago, I found something on ebay that caught my eye. It is just a few feet away from me

                             and it sparkles and shines. It is an aluminum vintage Christmas tree. It has a color wheel that sits 

                             on the floor and the wheel turns and as it does projects  four different  colors on the tree.  


                           Many times I turn off all the lights and sit quietly in my office and stare at the tree. As I do it 

                           takes me back  to a time and place where life was a lot simplier.. my childhood. My family never 

                           owned one of these . The small white  church where I grew up had a small one.  Each year, it was placed on a                                small table off to the left side in the very front. 


                           I would sit there and watch as the tree changed color .  I am not sure I paid any attention to the preachers                                   words as  I stated  at the tree .As it turns out, I think the words I heard influenced me more than I realized at                               the time. a young boy, that little church had a big impact on me and my life. My faith was growing

                           and little did I know but in a few years I would need it more than ever. I went off to college and met 

                           very smart people who thought it was stupid to believe in Jesus.


                          I remember one particular Christmas when  I was struggling at many diffent levels. I had just came home

                          and was very tired after a long drive. My mom wanted me to go see a play put on by the kids . 

                          I agreed to go but my heart was not in it at all.  When I got there it seems they were needing 

                          someone to be God's voice in this little play. They talked me into it but I did not feel qualified or worthy.

                          

                          I agreed to do so and stood out of sight behind a white curtain. When I  spoke for God I talked slowly and                                   clearly holding an empty paper towell holder to my lips. I do not remember my lines or the verses I uttered. I                              do remember the wonderful feeling I had as I had in my heart for being allowed and choosen to do that.

                       The gal that asked me to do that did so on a whim but I feel it was from Him. She had no idea what that 

                        that meant to me and it warmed my heart and lit a fire that had almost went out.


                       I still get that feeling when I am asked to  give a talk or participate in a church service. I get

                       great satisfaction and that wonderful feeling of peace and refreshment  even as I type these very words .   I do                             so with the hope my efforts please him. I live with the hope  that perhaps they will be found on a day when                                another's light is    flickering and about to go out. I am both honored and shocked God would use me to play a                           part. He knows my heart and my true colors  better than anyone including me. Turns out as I read my 

                       my Bible , it seems he has used  to  flawed and blemished people to turn other's hearts around and back to him. 



                      The full measure of a man is not to be found in the man himself, but in the colors and textures

                      that come alive in others because of him.                                     Albert Schweitzer


                       Whatever comes from the heart carries the heat and color of its birthplace.

                                                                                                                                          Oliver Wendell Holmes Sr.

                       

                       


 ENTRY

                            Christmas brings a plethora of thoughts  and feelings. I sit here at my computer and  think 

                            how different it is now from years ago. Two of our sons live close by and plan to drop by our 

                            house later today with their wives. Both are soon to be fathers, and it is very exciting to think 

                            we will soon be grandparents.


                            Our oldest son is in the military and lives in Japan. He will not make it home and this stings a bit. 

                            He has been in close to ten years and this is only the second Christmas he has not made it home.

                            We feel very blessed for the times and are very thankful for those. We try to focus on our many blessings

                            and try to think about all we have instead of what is missing. He has his orders and will be returning

                            to the states in early March. He will be in florida for about a month and we hope to go down and visit.

                            I look forward to the feel of the  warm sun on my face but even more to my son's strong hug and embrace.


                           I love to read and enjoy learning new words. Not long ago I stumbled across the word, atiptoe. After 

                           looking it up , I drew a little picture of a face looking over a fence at me and I can only see his eyes. 

                           This will help me remember its meaning. Atiptoe means to look forward to something with great excitement.

                            It is kinda of a word that almost makes sense . 


                            I imagine the little man I drew is standing on tip toes to see what is beyond.  I chuckle at my self and

                            because as I share my thoughts with you this very moment, I am doing just that. The presents are

                            still under the tree . I know nothing that my wife or son' presents  will give me as much pleasure as just                                           seeing them and being together. We will laugh and have fun and just like that it will be done. I know 

                            that sounds sad, but tell me if I am wrong . I will watch them go down the drive and will look forward to

                            the next visit. The upcoming florida trip  if God allows will march on and we will headed back home with a                                   brown  face and a blue heart.


                            Life is at times complex. The same family that had tears of joy picking up family at the airport a few days                                   ago  will soon  shed tears of sadness as the same loved ones depart. So I guess what I am trying to say

                           is we should try to again focus on today and what we have and what we have had. It is ok and perfectly

                           fine to look forward to the future but not so much that we miss the wonderful things that are right here 

                           right now.


                          I thank God for the gift of life. I thank him for sending his son, Jesus. Because of what he did for us we 

                          will be able to live with him forever. It is hard to imagine a place without hardship, tears, fears,

                          and good byes.  Do you hope you are going to heaven are are you sure? There are only two types of faith 

                          for those who do believe. There is hope so and know so. Give your heart to Jesus today. There is nothing you

                         could give to him that would please him more. Nothing you you have been given , own, or done can 

                         give you any more joy or satisfaction than his presence in your life. His spirit will help you weather the weary,                          dreary, and teary days all the while reminding you the best is yet to be and we can look forward to them

                         with atiptoe.


                        The same fence that shuts others out shuts you in.

                                                                                                                        Bill Copeland 



                        The moment after Christmas, every child thinks of his birthday.       

                                                                                                                        Stephen Uys


                        The soul would have no rainbow had the eyes no tears.

                                                                                                                         John Vance Cheney                             

                                          


 ENTRY

                            Christmas is just around the corner. People are out and about looking  for the perfect gift for loved ones 

                            and family.  The malls are still quite busy despite online shopping. Every evening I do my little routine and                                  take our red ATV down to get the mail before I go over to the horse barn to feed my friends. It seems each                                  year there are more and more magazines. They are there to remind me what I need and is lacking in my life.

                           I feel most of us are pretty good at that on our own and do not need any help in that regard. 

 

                           I saw a cartoon recently that had a medievil theme. It showed a large catapult pushed up close to a castle 

                           wall and the castle door was shut tight. The man in command told his men that it was Christmas 

                           and it was time to release the magazines  .It made me chuckle and think of it watch evening as I open our                                    mailbox.


                            Holidays, especially Christmas, makes me very  nostalgic. Even though the boys have grown and flown the                                   nest, this time of year brings many wonderful memories  to mind. My wife places pictures taken down                                           through the years and she puts them out around the large nook where we eat our meals. I look at  them                                          often and it feels good and yet  stings a little at the same time. There is not a parent out there that  does                                not exactly how these bittersweet  memories tease our very hearts.


                           Years ago ,I was walking out to do something in our garage. Christmas music was playing in the house.

                            Our middle son,Jace ,and our youngest ,Jarah ,were in the great room. They were laying on their stomachs                                    side by side both leafing through a Christmas catalog. The fire was on and it looked like a Hallmark                                                 commercial .  As they turned the pages, they both pointed to something they hoped Santa would bring                                        them. They were not aware of my presence and were excited about the presents... of a different kind

                              Christmas was just around the corner and hopes , desires, and expectations were high. I felt a sense of                                          peace come over me as watched them. 

                              As I did so, a bible verse came to mind :


                              How pleasant good and pleasant it is when brotherS live in unity.

                                                                                                                                          Psalm 133:1


                              After a few short moments, I came back in the house and heard a great commotion fronm the great room                                     that did not sound all that great. As I  came around the corner , they were fighting  and on top of the                                          magazine and several pages were ripped wrinkled and crinkled and a few pages were torn out.I separated                                      them and then learned that all had been well until they both pointed to the same toy. They both wanted the                               very same thing .  This amuses us because they fought as if there was only one of these on planet earth.

                             The peace in my home was over as they wrestled over such a silly little thing. 


                             I watch the news in that same room and see people  all over our country and the world doing the very 

                             same thing.It  is not amusing but scary.  We do not need to teach our children to be selfish. This sems to                                        come quite naturally. I really do not think we ever grow out of it. 


                             I have learned to been able to put my selfish side aside  and give forgiveness and grace to those who have                                   hurt me. I have not fully masterd this mind you but I am getting  better.  I have  a long way to go.

                             


                            This Christmas , I suggest a special gift for you. It may at first seem selfish but it is not ,I assure you. it is the                                 polar  opposite. This is something we do not get but is something we do recieve  when we give up the grudge                              or  chip on our shoulder from someone who has hurt you in the past. If  nothing or no one comes to mind, I                                     suggest you  pray for a better memory. Yup, we all have someone me included.


                            Give someone a break. Let it go! This will not come easy  . Your mind and your heart will wrestle  back and                                 forth as you try but still will not want to. Your heart wants to but your mind has it own list of offenses that it                            has kept and nicely cataloged for you .  Pray for them asking God's very best for them and those they love.

                            You will be floored by the sense of peace that comes over you ... it is not of this world.



                          The me-ism of our times has taken a serious toll on the family.

                                                                                                                  Charles Swindoll


                          My idea of Christmas whether old fashioned or modern , is very simple; loving others come to think

                          of it, why   do we have to wait to Christmas to do that.    Bob Hope


                                                   

                                                                                 


 ENTRY

                            I have been thinking about my dad .  I have been going through a rough patch

                            here of late and wish I could turn to him for advice. I often share some of the wisdom  my father passed

                            down to me  in the office . He has been gone a long time . His birthday was 2 days ago 

                            and if he was still here with us, he would have been 90 years old.


                            Oranges make me think of my dad. He would often tell me to peel my eyes when I was trying to see 

                            a deer or a rabbit in a thicket. I  guess that is my very  goal with this book is to try to teach the reader

                            how to spot God in the ordinary and everyday.


                            He loved to eat oranges and had one almost every single morning. He has his own medical theory

                            that you would never catch a cold if you had one daily. I would chuckle when Mom would catch heck if

                            we would run out. It could be 4 months later and dad would get a cold and he would blame it on Mom 

                             because he missed a day or two without an orange.


                             Christmas is just around  the corner and the malls are full and Amazon trucks and vans seem to be 

                             everywhere. We are trying to find the perfect  gift for loved ones. As I take this all in I remember a story my                                dad once shared with me about one special Christmas he had as a boy. 


                            My dad grew up without a dad. His father ran off and left my grandmother Hazel with 4 young chilren.

                            They were very poor and they struggled. She kept them all fed and clean but times were lean. I took the help                              of extended family but they made it. One Christmas, my dad's only gift was an orange. It was all his and 

                            he did not have to share it. Can you imagine how far a gift like that would go over now days? Orange you 

                            a little embarrassed ? I know , I am.


                            I blush beet red  as I type these words because we are the type of country that has been so blessed with                                         abundance .We aquire more and more  and put more and more on our plates  . Maybe we are morons. Could                                   it be that less is more? Should we are try hard to put less on our plates? Is this the' less on 'we  all cannot                                    seem to remember? Is that the secret not only about enjoying Christmas but life in general ?


                             I Love to listen to the wonderful Christmas songs on the radio. Between the songs are the ads that try to get                               us to add more. These ads appeal to our  greed and make us all confuse needs with wants. Without realizing                               it they just caused us to tune in to our own selfish and favorite station, WIFM. This acostic 

                             stands for :

                              Whats

                               In it

                               For

                               Me



                            We need to tune in to God's word and calibrate our hearts to hear and listen to his voice. Peel your eyes and                              look for good and you will see  it. Be the good and share what you have with others. It might just be

                            one of your best Christmas's ever.



                                   Seek first the virtues of the mind; and other things will come or not be wanted.

                                                                                                                                                    Francis Bacon



ENTRY

                            I have set out to write a devotional about things in and around our house. As a reader , I have taken you 

                            out into the fields and forests. I have told you stories about our horses and barns. Today I am 

                            frustrated because I can't come up with anything. 


                            I have many goals and dreams and like you probably will not live long enough to accomplish all of them.

                            I would like to someday write a book about things that happened in the office . I even have a possible title                                 for it called" BEHIND THE SEENS'. With your forgiveness, I would like to take a story about the office and                                     share   it with you today. I found  a large tin foiled E in our garage in a drawer. I have not clue how this came                                 to be  but since its  here I feel it qualifies.


                           I cut this large E out of cardboard years ago. To my surprise, I had patients that were adults that did not know

                           their letters and could not read or write. I used this most often with kids. When I checked their vision , I                                      would put up a chart on the wall that had all E's turned in all directions. I would hand them the tin foiled

                            E to match the one projected on the wall.


                           When I did this, I usualy started off with  big E with the bar on the bottom with the three arms

                            sticking up. Once when I was doing this, I asked a little four year old boy what he saw on the wall. He 

                            looked at it for a long while  with a puzzled look on his face. He answered with a question. He's response 

                           was," a drunk E?


                           I have told this story in the office many times down through the years. His answer tells us that he put                                           and  two and  two together and got floor! Like you, I was not aware that an E could drink. I tell this humorous                            story but it saddens me a bit as well. As young as he was, he had seen the effects that drinking can have

                           on people. Someone in his life was setting a poor example for him and had forgot as we all do, that this little                               ones are always  watching and listening . 


                                        Two things that a man cannot hide : that he is drunk and that he is in love.

                                                                                                                                         Antiphanes


                                         Sometimes God has to put us flat on our back before we are looking up to him.

                                                                                                                                              Jack Graham

                          


 ENTRY

                            I had a lot of  pain last night. I have been having a lot of hip and back issues that haunt me

                            from time to time . I had a pretty good day pain wise but it it was Halloween all night long. I even got up                                       during the night and took the combo of pills that usually work but it did very little to put the fire out. I do                                   not feel like myself this morning and probably should not be at my computer. I do not like pity parties or like                               being around people who tend to throw them.


                           This short entry is about my alarm clock . A week or so ago it was just an alarm clock. It is small black 

                           and battery operated. It still does it's job and wakes me and sends me off to work  even when the electricity

                           is off. I  think I have shared before in print my family's weird habit of naming things we own and use.

                           For example , our red ATV is called ,Chuck.  You see it is used as I go around the pasture to feed our horses.

                           Even the sound of it , causes great excitement and nickering as the chuck wagon delivers vittles.


                           Wisdom comes into our lives from many different ways. Yes we earn a lot from books, movies and even You

                            Tube. Many lessons come to us through things we learn from other people . The may say things that cause us                             to look at something with a new perspective. I see myself  as one who tries to glean and from time to time                                     pass on  and along things that may help others as well as just being too good not to share.


                           I was talking with a patient that had just had a tumor removed from his kidney. It was benign and

                           he discussed the discomfort of his  surgery and the after effects but was grateful for that and

                           glad to be alive. I had tapped into one of my previous loops about being frustrated at the alarm

                           sounding off rousing me from sound sleep . I got up staggered towards it with an attitude.


                           The patient told me what he had learned recently. He corrected me and said that was not the way I should                                   treat it at all. He went on to say , I should pat it gently  after  I turned off the alarm button.  

                           He gently scolded me and I should not approach it  in that manner. I should not be irratated or angry 

                           but grateful. It was not a rude awakening but was just reminding me of something that I  had forgotten.

                           I was alive and  could get up out of that bed and go about my day and  on my way. To be honest , I did not do                              this this morning. My restless night caused be to be ticked off. I am working  on putting this new habit in                                      place and I guess I do not have it  down pat just  yet.  By the way, the alarm that sits near by my bed and                                  reminds  God has  given me another day has been given  the name Pat. ;)



                       Learning sleeps and snores in libraries, but wisdom is everywhere , wide awake on tiptoe.

                                                                                                                                                       Josh Billings


                       Time marks us while we are marking time.                            Theodore Roethke



                       This is the day the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it.     Psalms 118 : 24


                          



 ENTRY


                             Less than a week ago ,it was Opening Day for shotgun season in Indiana. My sons who 

                             live close to us were busy that day and our oldest was in Japan.  My heart was a little heavy as I set out 

                             for a solo hunt. It was a great morning to hunt and there was little to no wind. I  only saw one deer all                                          morning right at first light. I was to dark and too far away to even tell if it was a buck or a doe. I do some of                                my best praying in the woods and I had plenty of time on my hands because the deer certainly did not                                          distract me.


                            Shortly after daybreak I was distracted several times over the next 4 hours by the lowing of a cow to 

                            the north. I knew what this was all about. This is the sound of sadness. A cow that recently had a calf 

                            has been separated from her little calf. Perhaps it had been put up in a pen because it is time to wean 

                            the little one. I never heard the sound of the calf making me wonder if it has been sold . I listed to her bawl

                            and must admit it evoked emotion in my own heart for when the boys lived under our roof and we all went                                   out and hunted together on opening day.


                             Her persistant lowing caused me to think of a Bible story.  The Israelites were in a war against the

                             Philistines and  they were losing. They decided to bring the Ark to the battlefront to give them courage 

                             and hope.  This caused the Hebrews to shout so loud it made the ground shake. The Philistines were afraid                                   when they realize the Ark was present.


                             This was not enough and the Philistines won the battle and captured the Ark. They took it and placed 

                               in their temple in front of their God ,Dagon. The next morning their statue of Dagon had tipped over as if                                       bowing in front of the Ark. They stood it up again and the next morning found it had fell over yet again                                      but  this time the head and arms were broken off as it laid prostrate before the Ark.


                              Sickness and tumors broke out and the people panicked. They sent it off to a nearby town and the same                                         thing happened there affecting old and young alike. They wanted to get rid of it in a hurry. The built a new                                 cart and hitched up two cows that had neved been yoked. Both cows had just had calved  and the little                                         ones were penned up. They loaded the cart with gold shaped tumors and gold rats as a token hoping  the                                     God    of the Hebrews would forgive them. They knew if these new moms would lead the cart away  and                                        back it  was from God. The cows did not turn to the left or right and took the ark right back to the Israelite 

                              nation. This is not natural or normal and was indeed a miracle.  The Bible tells us the new mothers were                                         lowing all the way.


                               Our nation, a nation that is supposed to be under God is now under attack. We have taken God our of our                                   schools and lives. We thought we need not heed his commands and laws and have put the truck in the  

                               truck in the ditch. Our country is having separation anxiety from God and the cries of despair  can be                                           heard   thoughout the land  and rightly so. 


                               As the deer pants for streams of water , so my soul pants for you , O God.

                                                                                                                                                             Psalm 42:1


                               The slaughter was very great ; Israel lost thirty thousand foot soldiers . The Ark of God was 

                               captured.                                                                                                            1 Samuel 4:11


                               

                                                                                                                                                                                        

 ENTRY

                            There is a grave in the field behind our house. It is where my father's horse is sleeping in the ground.

                            His name was Rusty. My dad bought him from some people who lived near the Ohio River in  small

                            town called Derby.  My dad loved the show Bonanza. Rusty was the spitting image of the horse the 

                            that  the main character, Ben Cartwright, rode in the hit tv show.


                             He was a buckskin. to this day it is one of my favorite colors. He was tan in color with a black mane

                             and tail. He had strands of silver in his black mane and tail. He was a  tall horse and was very muscular.

                             He was a crossbreed. His mother was a Saddlebred named Easter because she was born on Easter 

                             morning. His sire was a full blooded Quarter horse.  He had the muscularity of a quarter horse and stood                                     around 16 hands. He had a proud walk and held his heard very high. As you sat upon him, you looked out at                               the world between his ears like a picture frame.


                            We had to break him and he was hard headed and stubborn. I did not like him at all at first. In the end it

                            was well worth it and was the best horses we ever had  and to this day my favorite. As dad got older he gave                               him to me. I brought him to our farm to take care of him but in my heart Rusty was dad's horse.


                            We were very close and he always looked forward to me coming home from college and would run to greet 

                            and meet me. I had to rub his big ole head before I would go into the house. It was tradition and my dad                                       claimed he could tell the sound of my car  long before I  came into sight.


                            I most often rode him bareback and rode him all day and he came into the barnyard with his head held high                                and a spring in his step as if he was ready for another long excursion. He would slide down a creek bank and                               swim across the creek and often I would would fall off and show off and grab his tail. It was fun but not fast                                enough to ski behind.


                             My wife says to this day Rusty did not like her. She thinks that Rusty was jealous of her.  Rusty and me 

                             were tight. Then I bring this pretty gal home from college and spent less  time with her him and more and                                      more time with her. I must admit she may be on to something. Rusty would lay his ears back and bare his                                     teeth at  Kim. Even though she was not in the pen ,this would cause her to take a few steps back. To this day

                              sometimes I try to lay my ears back as  I shave and I look in the mirror . I would give anything to back her                                   up like that when we have a disagreement without saying a word.

                            

                             I  would take off my tee shirt and put it under his hugh neck. This 1200 pound animal would neck reign with                              just  this gentle pressure . I would run him as fast as he could go and he  would turn and stop with the gentle                               pressure of my shirt. My dad was shocked and surprised  the first time he ever saw me  do this.  I often think                                of this and his trust and loyality to me. It   reminds  me that I should  be  responsive to  the gentle nudges of                               my Master. This fine horse set a fine example  that I think of when I am not sure where  life is taking me. I                                     just need to trust and obey knowing God knows the way.


                             Remember I said I did not like him at first? He was difficult  to break and had some really bad habits.  It                                     took it a lot of time and trouble to get him  to come around.  My dad taught me  that you have to be careful                                  when breaking a horse. You need to teach them good habits and break them of their bad habits, but must be                                careful to never break their spirit. There is an old saying that the wildest colts make the best horses

                             and we found this to be true.


                            When I think back on this , I often think about the apostle Paul. He hated Christians an was an enemy.

                            Despite this, God did not give up on him and saw great potential to be a powerful force . At first Christians

                            were very wary of Paul thinking it has to be some kind of trick. Jesus saw something special in him and saw                                he had raw potential that he could use for good. He would need to tweak him and hone his skills some of                                     which were a little rusty.


                           Over the years , many who do not believe come around and come to Christ have proven to be   some of the                                    most effective  spokesman and recruiters in bringing people to closer to him. How exciting to know God

                            can use you or me if we just follow His lead to a tee.



                                    Habit is habit ,and not to be flung out a windowby any man, but coaxed downstairs 

                                    a step at a time.                                                                        Mark Twain



                                    The wildest colts make the best horses.

                                                                                                               Plutarch


                                      When we put bits into the mouth of horses to make them obey us, we can turn 

                                       the entire animal.                                      James 3:3




 ENTRY

                            It is fall and here of late I have being doing little around the house chores as we prepare for winter.

                            I am always filling up the horse troughs and each and every time must try to remember to

                            unhook the hoses to prevent freezing. I have goofed up in this area a time or two and dodged a bullet as                                          nightly temps have dipped below freezing. 


                            The vehicles must be winterized as well. The boat must be put in storage after it tuned not up but down for a                               winter rest and sleep. Begrudgingly  I go about these tasks . I know what to do but I do not want to 

                             but I have no choice. The beautiful trees that give us beauty, refreshing shade, and relief from the

                            scorching  summer sun  lose their leaves and leave us with yet even  more work to do.


                             I am not near as fond of winter as I was in my youth. I loved snowy days which led to no school and sled 

                             riding. Those days are far behind me. Now  I must get up very early on rough weather days

                             and make the call to see if we will still run that day or if we need to stay put and close the office that day.

                             I must factor in my office staff as well as patients  who will get out and about to make their appointments .

                             The sidewalks  at the offoce must be salted  to prevent falls.I will need to get out the tractor and grade our                                steep hill with the grader blade so we can get up and down our drive.


                             I wanted to be a grown up so I could do whatever I wanted whenever I wanted. That has not worked out 

                             as planned so far.  It seems there are not enough hours in the day as need be. Too be honest it, bothers

                             me because it takes me longer to do things than it used to. Back in my younger days my back did 

                             not hurt like it does these days and the bones do indeed know when a front is moving in .


                             Nonetheless I praise God that I am still here and thank him for all the days of life he has given me . 

                             My friend you and I have something in common with a calendar... you see our days are numbered too.

                             I am in the winter season of my own life and I must make adjustments because of this. We need to get our                                   affairs in order and make sure we are right with God .We can get side tracked and  forget the most 

                             important thing of all. We must think ahead and be prepared  prepare to meet our Maker regardless of our 

                             age. 

                             


                                      Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.

                                                                                                                                     Psalms 90:12


                              Winter is not a season ; it is an occupation.                     Sinclair Lewis


 ENTRY


                             Years ago my oldest son and I drove down to Evansville  to look at cars. I had worked that day and had no                                   clue my son wanted to look at every single car on lots scattered across the city. There were lots and lots of                                    lots. We got home around one in the morning and I had to work the next day. He drove home and I                                                  snoozed for an hour.  I woke up about a mile from our house and rubbed my eyes. As I did so, I saw                                                 something  white along the road on the right side in the weeds. It was drizzling rain and I asked Josh to stop                               and back up. I reached down into the weeds and picked up a small little yellow and white kitten. He was                                       cold  and wet  and easy to find because he was very vocal. We have had him for close to 15 years now.  His                                   name is Sushi.


                             He spends his  nights in the garage but is quite the hunter and roams all over our yard and  down into the                                     woods  as  well. He is spoiled and comes running when we tell him we have cookies (treats). He is very picky                              and loves his treats . When he is successful on a hunt, he will  bring his kill into our garage and place it right                                 in front of  the door . We literally  have to  step over his trophy to walk out . The thought of eating one of his 

                             victims has not ever crossed his mind.


                             One time I was fussing out loud to my wife about yet another kill I will have to pick up and dispose of. 

                             I thought this was odd and  funny that he does this. My wife kim asked why I thought that this was so 

                               amused by this and then with great pleasure pointed out to me that I do the exact same thing. 


                              She explained that I go out into the woods after a big buck. I shoot him and then bring  it out of the woods.

                              I drag it into our garage and then knock on the door with great excitement. I make everyone come out into                                the garage  to show off my most recent kill and trophy. I think a spotted yellow and white  cat has my tongue                               . I cannot  think of anything to say back to refute that. 


                             What I was not picking up on was the fact that this story is a perfect example how much easier it

                              is for me to spot other's spots rather than my very own!





                              Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention 

                              to the plank in your own eye.                                             Matthew 7:3


                               If cats could talk, they wouldn't.                Nan Porter


                              Kittens are angel with whiskers.                   Alexis Flora Hope


                              No matter how much cats fight, there always seem to be plenty of kittens.

                                                                                                                                             Abraham Lincoln


                                        



ENTRY 29


                   I have worn a beard for many years. I used to wonder how anyone could stand to have hair on their face

                   in the summer. I found to my surprise that as your sweat it has a cooling sensation and actually

                   feels pretty good.


                   Several years ago I went in the bathroom and shaved it completly off. In a few days our family would be flying

                   to Cancun with several other close friends and their kids. I did this because I knew we planned to go snorkling

                    and facial hair allowed water to get inside a mask and made it almost impossible to see underwater .                                          As I came out of the bathroom, our youngest son Jarah had the strangest look on his face. He keep staring at  

                     me knowing something was different. It took him a few minutes before he figured it out. We later realized that                        he was age 13 or so and had never in his life seen me without a beard.

                    

                   I try to keep my beard short and well groomed. It is amazing how fast it grows when  I will often let it go on 

                   vacation and days when I am not in the office. I hate to admit this but I do I have a trace of anxiety when 

                   I do this right before work. I  know this is not the time to trim a beard especially when I am cutting it close 

                   on time.


                  I have screwed up more than once but going too short even with the guard in place and them have to 

                  do it all to match that length. My biggest fear is the trimmer goes dead when I  half way into this project.

                  There is no time to recharge the trimmer and I have had to shave it almost all off with a razor.  I can tell 

                  everybody is looking at me like Jarah knowing something is odd and different despite my best efforts to hide                           my botch job.


                 Often when I am doing this, I think of a story back in the Bible. King David sent some men with good wishes 

                 and intentions to another king. David has been friends with Nahash for years and he passed away. This new                          king was his son and was paranoid and thought they were sent to spy on his country. His advisors gave him poor                     advice. He did something to humiliate them and sent the men back home and on their way. He cut off half of                          their robes exposing their backsides. He also cut off half of their beards as well as this was a badge of honor                          back then. These men were sent to Jericho to live in until their beards grew out.


                 This angered King David and this led to a war and the loss of life and much bloodshed. Several armies 

                 came together to fight against  Israel but in vain.



                 So Hanun seized David's ambassadors and shaved off half of each man's beard , and cut off their robes 

                  at he buttocks, and sent them back to david in shame.                          2 Samuel 10:4




                 If you're never scared or embarrassed or hurt , it means you never take any chances.

                                                                                                                                                                   Julia Sorel



                Advice is an uncertain gift.                                                                                            

                                                                    Whitney Jeffery



                Half of art is knowing when to stop.

                                                                                   Arthur William Radford



ENTRY 30


               The other evening  our youngest son and his wife came out to help with some chores around the house. 

               One of the very last tasks was to help me pull up a rose bush that had not made it through the winter. We

                went over and I dropped my son off at the horse barn and he drove the tractor back to the house. We 

                pulled the tractor up close to the plant and put a chain at the bottom. It took a try or two but I could not help 

                admire how stubborn the plant was and stood its ground perhaps  providing a lesson to us all.


                The tractor is still sitting out in the yard. It is New Holland and is a newer Ford and is blue. My grandpa 

                had blue tractors as did my dad . We have two on the farm and they are both blue. We do blue .

                The newer one is called  45 D . It has been a great tractor and has been loyal and has been a good investment.


                 I was looking for this make and model for awhile. I found another one that was a better deal  had convinced my

                  better half this was needed and had her blessings. The dealership was closed but we drove over to show my                            boys boys the  newest addition lord willing. There was a slight drizzle and I climbed up on the seat. I was              excited                and eager 

                 pull the trigger when they opened the next day.


                I heard God speak to my heart . He told me not to buy this tractor. I was sure about this and was disappointed to

                say the least.  I joined my family in the truck and my wife asked me what was wrong. I  did not say anything 

                my excitement was gone as was the spring in my step. I really wanted this tractor! I was as blue  but knew what

                to do, or what  not to do in this case.


                 I have taught the boys to ask the Lord for guidance on decisions they need to make especially on big 

                 purchases. We pray to help it to go through if it is his will and block it if  it is not his will for us.He sees everything 

                 including the future. We are to trust in his judgement and not our own.


                 I have told this to a few down through the years. I think about that tractor and wonder where it went . 

                 Maybe this blue tractor was a lemon and was going to be  a moneypit .Perhaps a mechanical issue could have led

                 to harm or death to one of my sons down the road.


                 I will never know the reason I was told no. There might be another reason and this would be something

                 I  think is a strong possible reason all of us should  consider . Maybe God blocked me because he wanted someone 

                 else to have it. Without knowing it I was blocking a blessing he had in mind for another.

                 

                 He knew I would find another and could have told me the serial number would be before

                 I was born.  Things have been given to me and my family  and the chain of events down through the years

                 have been miraculous.


                 As we walk in faith , may we listen to his voice trusting him to guide us with our steps as well as our stops!



                  The steps of  the Godly are directed by the Lord. He delights in every detail of their lives.

                                                                                                                                                        Psalms 37:23


                   Obedience is better than sacrifice.                                                   

                                                                                   1  Samuel 15:20






                  

ENTRY 31


                   It is Memorial day 2023. This morning I was thinking about  one of the rituals we did at this time of year 

                   when we were growing up. Our dad would get us up early and we would drive up the hill to  the cementary.

                   The local veterans would shoot a 21 gun salute to honor those who had fought and served in the military

                    of our great nation. They would place small American flags on each soldiers gravesite.  

                    

                    To be honest ,my heart is a little heavy this Monday morning. As usual a few people have texted me asking 

                     pass along thanks to our oldest son Josh who serves in the navy. I always do this but at present he lives in Japan.

                     He is at sea and we cannot text or email him until he reaches the next port. 


                     I sleep in what used to be his bedroom. On the wall is a poster of a jet coming up and towards us with 

                     the aircraft carrier below. I look at this often and cannot wrap my mind around the fact that he does this for

                     a living. He is aboard the USS Ronald Reagan somewhere off the coast of Japan. It is ironic because he is a navel

                     aviator and that was the first ship he landed on. 


                    It is a very dangerous job and even more so while doing night landings on a ship whose runway is always

                    moving.  As I type these words it is 9:23 in the morning. Another thing I cannot fathom is that he is on the other 

                     side of the world and is 13 hours ahead of us. So our day is just starting but he is about to put Monday to bed

                     and in 90 minutes it will be Tuesday there!


                     My own dad is up on the in the cementary sleeping with those who served . He was in the army and served 

                      during the Korean war. He loved airplanes and I wish he could have lived to see what his grandson does for

                     a living.


                     Afew years ago, we went as a family to Wright Patterson  in Ohio. The have a museum there and it is divided

                     into different sections. I lingered in the area about the korean war beacuse of dad. There was something there 

                     that 'blue' my mind.


                      In a glass case was the belongings of a soldier who was a POW. He had a short pencil and a small spiral 

                      notebook. Several pages were on display. To keep from going crazy, he would try from time to time recaal states

                      and their capitals. He did a lot of math primarily 3 digit numberes times 3 digit numbers. He would try to recall 

                      as many U.S. presidents from time to time sometimes doing far better than others.


                      At the back of his book was a things to do list. This young soldier had a list of things he planned to do

                       not if but when he got home. I read the short list but one entry stood out and said:

                       Change the oil in the blue Ford truck.


                        We will never know if he made it home safely or even alive. His list inspires me and should do the same for 

                        you as well. He had to keep hope alive and know he would make it.


                         If you see a vet thank them for their service. Also thank God for allowing us to live in the greatest

                         nation on earth. Thank him also for for he went through to make a way for us to get home and live with him                               forever.  Read  God's word to give you the patience and stamina  to hold on. These words are like no other 

                         you need to anchor your hearts to them. They will give you to courage needed to weather any and every storm.


                         May God bless all those who have served, are serving, and those who will. May he be with their families

                          who miss them but are so proud of what they stand for. 





                           The average pencil is seven inches long, with just a half inch eraser in case you thought optimism

                            was dead.                                                                                                    Robert Brault





ENTRY 32


                           Our black stallion , Aztec, is a wonderful animal. He is big and  muscular and is well  behaved.  

                           He is a fresian cross. I have always read about this breed and knew they were known for their 

                           high intelligence. I often joke that I not only think I could teach him to play euchre but to renig as well!

                           

                           He  is a good dad and has passed on his laid back manner to his babies . That is a big plus when it comes

                           to sires. Good and bad temperments can be passed on and along and down to offspring. You

                           probably thought that only applied to people didn't you?


                           I must admit , he is a charmer and he is one of my favorites. He is in a side pasture right now with two mares.

                           He is quite sociable and always comes up for a meet and greet wheter I have feed or not. Some of the others

                           require much more coaxing and calling and almost proof you have feed before they will even bother.


                           The other evening, I was running low on feed.  I had just a little . Even though he is much bigger , 

                           he lets the mares boss him around.  I gave him what little I had. He was excited to see me and I rubbed his

                           jaw and powerful neck. He was glad to see me but even more excited when I reached for the green feed 

                           bucket . He started making sounds , loud sounds. I told him to be quite. I knew these grunts and  squeals

                           would alert the others. I knew they would come up and take his food away.  Soon he was quitely munching 

                           the others did not have a hunch he was eating a late lunch.


                          I felt a little guilty and wondered why I favored him. He seems to be loyal to me  and is always

                          happy to see me. I think I rewarded him not only because of this but because he does not cause trouble

                           and lets the others take his feed and does not fight . He is much bigger and stronger than the others

                           and could easily overpower them should he choose to cause trouble. The fact that he does not is maybe why

                           I will give him a little more now and then for being a peacemaker.  When I do this, I cannot help but 

                           wonder if God does the same with us.


                          Aztec was able to scarf down his grain before the other figured out what he was up to. I thought how 

                          tried to get him to be quite after I blessed him. It made me think of a few instances in the Bible where

                          Jesus healed someone but told them  not to tell anyone. Sometimes they did not listen  and shot their mouth

                          off probably making it harder for him to do his thing without notice.


                          Jesus's own brothers wanted him to go public and attend a large gathering . They thought it would be a 

                          place to showcase his talents and gain limelight. Jesus told them that this was not the time to do this. 

                           Jesus later went but kept a low profile staying out of the public view. 


                           It seems to me that sometimes we need to stand our ground and speak up . Perhaps other times we

                           help God keeping our mouths shut. By not causing trouble and showing kindness, this goes against

                           the grain and people will be drawn to Christ because of what we do not do.



                           You cannot train a horse with shouts and expect it to obey with a whisper.

                                                                                                                              

                                                                                                                                                     Dagobert D. Runes



                           Have you given the horse its strength or clothed its neck with a flowing mane?       


                                                                                                                                                      Job 39:19


                           After his brothers had left for the festival,Jesus also went,though secretly, staying 

                           out of the public view.                                                                                              John 7:10



                           Instantly the leprosy disappeared . Then Jesus instucted him not to tell anyone

                           what had happened.                                                                                      Luke 5:14



ENTRY 33


                       Often the last task of the day is to let our two dogs out right before bedtime. We put a plastic neon 

                       collar on  them to  help keep track. Skyler is black as night and finding a black  dog at night

                       is  impossible. Since she is a girl , her collar is pink. Buster has a blue one.  The collars can be set on 

                       blinking mode or continuous . I prefer steady eddie, the dogs could not care less.


                       I love these warm summer nights. As I sit there, I enjoy a far more spectacular light show! Thousands

                       of lightning bugs flicker on and off  all across out yard and far out into the fields. The stars sparkle in 

                       the heaven I am in awe of the beauty God teases us with. I am tired and cranky and often scold the dogs 

                       to get in the house. I am disappointed how in many ways I have lost my childlike wonder.


                      As I sit there on our back porch, these luminous insects take me back to a memory that happened in Troy

                      In. years ago. My grandparents built a red brick house   in this small river town in the late 60's .I spent many                               hours there and often took my bike and rode all over town. I made many friends that  I looked forward  to                                     playing  with . My favorite spot was a park that allowed one to look out and over the Ohio River far below.                                  I spent many hours of my youth there and still to this day will drive up there from time to time.


                     There is a large statue of Jesus there. His arms are wide and stretched out . There is a bright light that shines 

                    upon it.  For years I was the keeper of the light. The lady next door would call me when it went out and I 

                     went down and replaced it. I miss doing that, but I still try to shine my light on Jesus with my writing  and                                   stories.


                     Also at the base was flowers. They  started looking rough . I took dirt from our farm to put around the base 

                     and planted several knockout roses on each side. As I was  completing this task  one evening , I ran out of                                     daylight.A little girl next door ran out of the house next door  . She was running and jumping and was  excited

                     about the green flashing lights all around her. She was speaking words I did not know. She kept saying 

                      'fear flew" . Neither her or her dad could catch one  getting closer to me with each and every unsuccessful try.

                   


                    I showed them my childhood trick. You bend real low and you can see them above you. I grabed one on the first 

                    try.  I slowly opened my hand. I was watching her eyes when she saw her first lightning bug up close.  I saw the                            greenish glow  relected on her face . She whispered with amazement 'fear flew'! I will never forget  that                                      wonderful  moment.  I will never be able to  look at them without thinking of her.


                    We talked  for just a few moments. They were visiting from Denmark. She had never seen lightning bugs before.                          Know why? It is because they do not have them in their  country. How blessed we are to have this amazing 

                     light show in our very own back yards.


                    I believe our childlike wonder will return when we get to heaven .  Jesus looks forward to showing us things 

                   not seen or known in this world. When we gaze upon  them for the very first time,  He will not be looking at it but                     at us. He will be smiling  and it will give him great pleasure as our eyes light up each and every time.

                   





                  Some people , no matter how old they get , never lose their beauty- they merely move it from 

                  their faces into their hearts.                                                                     Martin Buxbaum





ENTRY 34



                 I love this time of year. There is a flower that comes in to bloom that I am fond of. It is the orange Tiger Lilly.

                 Out in a field in front of our home is a large circular patch of them. Over the years I have dug them up 

                 transplanted them to various places around our house and yard. As I sat on our back porch watching our dogs, 

                  last evening I spotted yet another spot where 3 large clumps of them would fit in nicely.


                 We have a flagpole in front of our house and at the base the pole is surrounded by lillies. I put some along the side 

                 our stallion barn and they are coming up nicely . By far my favorite place showcasing these flowers is at 

                 entry way of our farm. I have watched them mature and spread along the small creek or branch that meanders 

                 below the hill over the years.


                  As usual and so often I am worrying as I am hurrying as I head off to work. My mind is already gearing up for days                     packed too full with too many patients. In just a few minutes, I will be up to my eyeballs with eyeballs1

                    I know I can do it  but I secretly ask myself if I can do it another day 

                   without losing my mind. Surprised? You thought  you were the only one who thinks that at times.


                    As I head down the hill, I pass along the small creek lined on both sides with lillies. Without fail, they                                             preach to my heart. My eyes enjoy what I envisioned years ago. Their placement was very much strategic.

                   They were put there to help me put it all in perspective when I get off track and lose focus which it seems is

                   daily.  Their placement is to remind to ask myself if God has first place in my life. Most often I do not like my own                      answer.These flowers speak to my heart and often scold me.  The Bible tells us to consider 

                   the lillies. It reminds us that they do not work . It tells us they do not worry about their clothing . Yet this is all 

                   done for them. It tells us that even King Solomon in all his glory was was adorned as nicely as they are.

                   


                   These  flowers are showcased to show us that God loves them . He takes care of them and they do not toil 

                   in the soil. They do not worry or hurry and remind us to do the same . Scripture tells us God loves us even more 

                   these wonderful flowers. He will meet all our needs and concerns if we just put him first.  Lets all consider 

                   the lillies and consider doing just that from now on.



                  Look at the lilies and how they grow. They don't work or make their clothing. Yet Solomon in

                 all his glory was not dressed as beautifully as they are. If God cares so wonderfully for the flowers 

                 that are here and gone tomorrow, won't he  more surely care for you?

                                                                                                                                                   Matthew 7:28-30     



                It is not the man who has too little who is poor , but the one who craves more.

                                                                                                                                                  Seneca 



               There is material enough in a single flower for the ornament of a score of cathedrals.

                                                                                                                                                   John Ruskin



ENTRY 35


                I get to talk with a wide variety of people in the office. This lends itself to all kinds of topics 

                and interesting conversation. I often ask about their hobbies and learn what they enjoy doing.

                Many tell me they enjoy taking pictures. My heart skips a beat or two because I also always have

                a camera handy and have taken thousands of pictures down through the years.


                When the say they like to write songs, I ask about their favorite song. When they say the like to read, 

                 I ask about the best book they ever read. When the tell me they enjoy photography, I ask them 

               about the favorite picture they ever took. More times than not, the have the answer  quite ready.


                Often they will turn the tables and ask me the same. This is an easy one for me . My best shot took

                place over at our horse barn then the boys were quite young. I took it over at our horse barn

                on  a very hot day. The boys took off their clothes and all three got in the large horse trough. The

                oldest, Josh, and the youngest, Jarah, are at the ends of the tank. Out middle son,Jace, was in the middle.


                 I had my Canon AE-1 all ready focused and good to go. Jace was diving below and we all laughed because we                       did not know what he was doing or what he was looking for. As he keep resurfacing only for oxygen , he

                 would head into the deep yet again but his white butt would stick up and out of the water .


                I saw a pattern and he popped to the surface and put his hands on the edge of the trough. The water is dripping

                off his face and it all clicked. The brand of the trough is called IDEAL and is in large red letters on the side of 

                tank. This was indeed an ideal setting  . This wonderful photograph and cherished memory has been enlarged

                and framed and sits on a shelf in my office.


                When the picture was developed, wife Kim voiced a concern about the tank. She knew that was the 

                 very tank our horses drank from. I assured her that the horses did not seem to mind and the horses

                 will be fine! ;)


                 The old saying is that you can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink. I once read where a

                 marketing student at a college quoted that to his professor. The mentor told him that was so true

                 but marketing was to make  the horse thirsty.


                 We are besieged daily with ads to make us want things. Have you ever found anything that does not lose 

                  it appeal after it is ours?  These things are well and good and not bad in themselves but the should 

                  lead us to the one who gave them to us. I am not sure what Jace was looking  at the bottom of that tank.

                  I am sure what we are all looking for.    There is no thing , nothing you can ever find that can 

                  give you the joy, peace, and purpose  that is found in knowing  Jesus.  Once you have him, it makes 

                  all the things in this world more enjoyable  It brings everthing else into proper prespective and focus.

                  Things that used to lead you astray won't any longer. Things that used to confuse you will start to click. 

                  Get the picture?



                  Jesus replied, "If you only knew the gift God has for you and who I am, you wouls ask me , and I 

                  would give you living water."                                                               John 4:10




                  A good snapshot stops a moment from running away.                    Eudora Welty




                 More important than a work of art itself is what it will sow. Art can die , a paiting can disappear .

                 What counts is the seed.                                                                            Joan Miro



                 

 

ENTRY 36



                  The horses are being bothered by the flies this time of year.  They seldom go into any kind of shelter 

                  when it is cold. However the flies make them head into the shed to get away from them. I try to put fly 

                  spray on them to help. I also use fly strips up in the barn and one shed has a timer that sprays a mist 

                  in the air making a fly want to be elsewhere.


                  Often when mowing a field , I  will leave my old Ford tractor out  in the field.  The next day I can get on

                  right where I left off. I noticed the horses would always be all around the tractor when I did this. I 

                  now realize the smell of fumes such as diesel  most likely make the flys back off.


                  We have one horse that is very hard to catch. When I put fly dope on the others, they find very quickly 

                  it helps from the get go and they have relief. The smarter ones are just almost as glad to see me pull the spray

                  out as a bag of carrots. When I have put the dope on all but the one difficult to catch, she is if for a long

                  day by her own design. She is the only one without cover . 


                 I often think about those Jesus has been pursuing for years. He offers us his presence and a peace 

                 that is beyond human understanding. He wants you to let him cover you and your sins with his blood

                 but we run from it. We are afraid to let him catch us . What we do not realize we are already caught.. caught 

                 up and in our sins as the Bible clearly explains. Jesus wants us to come to him to see how much better

                 our lives can be near  and in Him.


                 It is early morning. It looks like we are in for a hot day. If the horses are not already in the shed, they soon 

                 will be. I would like to shed a little light on something you might have missed. The last words of Jesus

                 were, it is finished." 


                 Hidden in the word finished are the words, he and shed. When he shed his blood, there was nothing more to                         do. It is finished. So are you my friend unless you come forward and let him cover you with his precious blood.

                 You will have one regret. You will wish you had done this years ago!



                   You will show me the way of life granting me the joy of your presence and the pleasures of living 

                    with you forever.

                                                                                                                                                               Psalm 16:10



                    Even the animalsthe donkey and the ox know their owner and appreciate his care, but not my people 

                    Israel. No matter what I do for them , they still do not understand.              Isaiah 1 :3


ENTRY 37



                    Yesterday I put on my old boots in the garage and was going out to check on the horses. As  the garage  door                         opened I was not expecting company at that hour. He sprang into action and launched himself 2-3 feet                                 the door. What exactly was hoppening here?  Perhaps this was this intruder a spy sent to see what is kept                              inside and on the other side of the door.


                     We live in the country and are used to garage surprises. Last week we have 2 raccoons eating

                      food from our cat's bowl. We had a turkey right up beside our garagedoor recently but did not enter.  Not                              long agoone of our young horses, Mingo,got out in the yard.She then came up to and in the garage eating                              food of a red bucket in the bed of our ATV.


                      Yesterdays guest was quite small compared to a horse. It was a grasshopper. I am not sure what he 

                       thought was kept in the garage. I thought about it longer than I would like to admit. I came up with the                                 thought he might  have been trying to flee for his life. Perhaps the noise from the garage door spooked                                  off the very  thing he was afraid off. I am not so sure about this theory. He was not afraid of me. 

                       I must have seemed like a giant to him.


                      These insects always make me think of  the story where Moses sent spies for forty days into a new and 

                       distant land God was giving them. This land of milk and honey  waiting but was filled with people who

                        were large and strong. Even thought they brought back bounty, ten spies thought it was a bad idea.

                       They reported these  people,Anakites,  were large and said we are small and like grasshoppers compared to                          them.


                       God was displeased with them and this led to a forty year long hike . The two spies ,Joshua and Caleb,who

                       wanted to enter despite the problems ahead were rewarded later much later. Forty years later they

                       not only got to see but own property in the promised land.


                      This story now has another lesson hidden in it . When they could ask for the property they wanted , 

                      Caleb asked for and was granted one still occupied. He was in his eighties and still have that can do we 

                      can whip em mindset in later years. This story dos not have a name but I named the grasshopper.

                      His name is Caleb.

 




                      Then Caleb quited the people before Moses , and said " Let us go up at once and take possession ,

                      for we are well able to overcome it. 

                                                                                                                                              Numbers 13:30

 





                      Most people say that as you get old, you have to give up things. I think you get old because

                      because you give up things.                                                                          Theodore Francis Green 



                      But my servant Caleb, because he has a different spirit in him and has followed me fully, I will bring  

                       into the land where he went , and his decscendants shall inherit it.

                                                                                                                                                     Numbers 14:24




ENTRY 38


           As I prepared for work the other morning, I had something happen that I found interesting. I stood at my 

           bathroom sink looking all around for the cologne planned to wear that morning. I mix it up now and then but it is              one of my favorites and my usual go to. It was the last thing I needed to do before I headed out the door.I

          could not find it to save my life. I even looked on the other shelves and moved things around thinking it was

           behind other bottles. I had to make a move and used another.


           I was still puzzled but the mystery was solved when I closed the cabinet door. There it was down and to the right              and right in front of me. The opened cabinet door kept me from seeing it.As I sped out the door and headed to work

           thoughts bounced around in my head. What could I take away from this lesson? What am I missing ?


           I heard a funny once where a comedian said his dad told him when one door closes another opens. He said his

          dad was a very wise man but a terrible cabinet maker. This jocoserious statement made me smile . I want

          you to open your dictionary and look up that word.That task keeps you busy and it keeps you from doing another.

           My point is rather simple.When we open ourselves to certain things, we may miss out on other chances

           or options. We need to chose wisely my friend!




          Failure is success if we learn from it.

                                                                                         Malcolm Forbes



ENTRY 39


            About a week ago, we had some rough weather push through our area. I came home from lunch to let

            our two dogs out. As I exited my truck ,I heard a sound that at first I could not comprehend. It was the sound of                   our security alarm going off inside the house! The sound was killing my ears and them for my short walk inside.

            I  knew it was not an intruder when I saw that the control panel was toast and from there I could not disarm

            it. I had to go to the main box and shut off the system.


           So for about a week we were without the internet, no television, no security, no phones, and our garage

           door opener is also toast. On top of always busy fun filled days, I have been trying to get it all up and running 

           again. It has been hard to have  match our time at home with the service visits. We are getting close and in a day 

          or two may even have Direct TV. Because of all our damage ,they are sure it was a direct lightning strike. We lost 

           two televisions and the status of the other two is pending.


         Despite all the time and trouble lost, I give God praise for protecting our home and beloved pets. We very well

         could be sleeping in a motel or with family had we lost our home to fire. All this stuff has been small taters.

         I was very frustrated several times and had to rein in my emotions and give my God praise instead of 

         giving Satan the satisfaction.



         Years ago, I was speaking at a large church. I told a story about how mad I had been earlier in the week when my

         muffler fell off my truck. As I was speaking, I told them my truck feel off my muffler. The crowd gave me an off the

         charts laughter. They thought this guy is good. How witty to say it like this since I was preaching about keeping it 

         all in perspective. I screwed up but it went over so well, I have been known to say it like that since and i 

         always get a wonderful reception.


         Sometime God has to take things away to make up appreciate them.  I feel from the bottom of my heart I have 

         given far more than I deserve. However I could lead the parade of not Shriners but Whiners. Many of 

          newer tech items have a reset button. We hoped  this would bring many of the damaged items back to normal

          but no such luck. When our luck lets us down lets send up some praise regardless. If you hear me raising hell 

          instead of my hands and heart in praise... please tell me to put a muffler on it!



          You can preach a better sermon with your life than with your lips.

                                                                                                                                       Oliver Goldsmith



          In everything you do, stay away from complaining and arguing so that no one can speak a word

          of blame against you.                                                                                   Philippians 2: 14-15


       




ENTRY 40


          On average, I would say we tend to buy three to four bags of carrots per week. People who do not

          know me or what I do for a living will often ask about them. The ones who know I am an eye guy often remark                   about them even more often.

         

           See it seems everyone knows carrots are good for the eyes. I think they think I am a  firm 

          believer in them and their help with vision and overall eye health. I always explain we have horses

          and that these are treats for our oatsmobiles at home. I always leave them with this caveat about carrots.

          Have you ever seen a horse wearing glasses?


          When my wife buys groceries, she often leaves the bags in the garage or throws them in the Rhino

          that we use on carrots runs. The horses know the sound of the red ATV and we call it Chuck. We call it

          that because it is a chuck wagon and is used to transport as well as deliver goods and goodies to the

          horses  out in the pasture. They nicker in excitement which is their way of saying goody in horse lingo.


          Even if they are munching on sweet feed and content, the sound of me tearing open a plastic bag of carrots

          quickly turns heads.   Seems these big horses are a little like us. They are happy and content  until

          comes along that is better.


         On my desk and right in front of me is a pack of carrot seeds. Next to it is a pack of pumpkin seeds. They are there

         to remind me of something I heard of years ago and I often share with patients from time to time. I goes like this:


         If you plant carrot seeds, what do you get?

         If you plant pumkin seeds , what do you get?

         What do you get when you do not plant anything?

         They get the first two right of course and usually miss the third question answering with nothing.

          The correct answer my friend is weeds!


         It takes a lot of work to even stay even. It takes a lot of work to keep the pasture and fence lines looking good.

         I am excited because lord willing , I  will be outside and up on a tractor brush hogging most of the day. I don't

         think the horses care one way or the other about the sound of the tractor approaching, but I don't think the weeds 

         like it at all.


         Sometimes we need to hang our on carrots on a stick to propel or prod us on . We get stuck in a rut and 

         idleness indeed is the devil's playgound. Plan for the next vacation or go out and reward yourself if you can lick 

        "ick "you been fighting be it booze, drugs, food,  or even  another  type of  karet addition. 


         I seed forth these words with the hope they will help and reach good soil. I am not sure they will ever find 

         into a book. I hope they do. I think a great book cover would be a carrot hanging out in front of us . Now, if we 

          just come up with a title to match.  I am not sure if you will like this suggestion as much as I do but 

          "I HOPE SOW" ;).




          Words are like diamonds. Polish them too much and all you get is pebbles.

                                                                                                                                                     Bryce Courtenay




           Lord , give me the determination and tenacity of a weed. 

                                                                                                                     Mrs. Leon Walters


ENTRY 41


           I have been spending a lot of time on the tractor here of late. The pastures are filled with tall weeds

           and the field look much nicer afterwards. It makes it easier for the horses to graze.  I have an old blue ford 

           tractor that I bought about the same time I bought the farm years ago. It has a big sturdy roll bar to 

           provide protection . On the rolling hills here on our property in southern Indiana , this is a desirable feature.


          I get up close to the fence line and this leads to tree limbs hitting me and often puting scratches on

          my arms and legs. It comes with the tuff. I was pretty well finished with this field the other evening .

           I took a little pass across the field to see if there were any places I had missed. 


          The field was all good but I saw a potential problem . As I had went under a wild cherry tree, the roll bar

           broke off a limb. It was still hanging on the tree but dangled all the way to the ground. It was still hanging

           by a thread but would be dead in a day or two. I am so glad I saw this. I had to go back to the house to get some

           snips and cut it off from the tractor seat high above the ground. I then have to put it outside the pasture so the

          horses could not munch on when it dried.


          My very first horse was named Dusty. I went up to ride one morning then I was a youth. The other horses were 

          present but Dusty was not there. My dad's horse seemed excited and agitated and would not let me catch or pet 

           him. It was like something you see in a movie and he led me to a steam up in the pasture .My beloved friend was 

          dead and laying in the steam at it deepest spot. The farmer who buried her said animals do this to try to stop the               pain after the eat something toxic or poison. Green leaves do not hurt them nor even dead or dried                                         wild cherry leaves after the first frost. If one of our horses had nibbled on this, I would have to bury another one.


          My hands shook as I typed the words above. I had to stop a time or two. It has been over 50 years. 

          I felt the shock and pain again as I shared this story. Why am I telling you this? Well it may help you protect your 

          livestock down the road. I guess I just want this story to remind you that things that are behind us can cause 

          harm if we do not know how to properly deal with them. Chew on that awhile.





         Watch out that no bitter root of unbelief rises up among you,for whenever it springs up, many are

          corrupted by its poison.                                                                                                          Hebrews 12:15




         Conseit is a weird disease- it makes everybody sick but the guy who has it.

                                                                                                                                                    James Dobson




ENTRY 42




          It has been pretty hot here of late. Sometimes I have to water the flowers around the house after work.

          I enjoy flowers and keeping them looking nice but it takes a lot of time and effort . I often send a little pray up

          thanking God when he sends down a nice rain shower.I have noticed they seem to do much better with His water.

          Could it be there are things in the rain we do not have access to? Maybe the chemicals we use in our water are 

           not  good forthe flowers all in all. I am sure glad do not drink that stuff!


           I am as a rule not a forgetful person . I will admit more slippage with age. I read something in my youth that will 

           stick with me as well as any sticky note It said:


            The best mind is no match for the palest of ink.


            You must realize by now,I love quotes. I also tell you who said what. I find this ironic that I did not write

            down who said this so to this day....no clue.I love and agree with the wisdom . I do not care who you are or how 

            smart we claim to be, the ink remembers  longer. We all are so busy. We have too much on our minds. 

            I do take a vitamin to help me remember but I can't remember where I put them.